something again

I tried to be happy and it really worked.
For a little while, then it poof-ed.
I happened like this, I was in the shower when I started to sing.
I sang something like this:
"I'd call but I have no voice,
so come close to me."
I was happy afterwards and I've decided to have a whole new attitude. "Let's do this, I said."

Then, a change in the game.
Mother called. She told me why she was frustrated yesterday. What she wished from us.
And I am back to my confused self. What should I do? What more should I do? What can I do? Mom can't be sad because of me/us.
Then, I have to so something.
I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.
I am what ever is left of my time.
Maybe take a little less off that, a little thought off that too.
Am I allowed to say that I am tired.
I feel bad saying so. Whoever's unhappiness, it's all my fault--that sort of mentality.